A living, breathing result of some insane genius' twisted breeding experiment, human hybrid Dick Bill only recently began tracing his heritage after becoming aware of the rewards privy to descendents of certain casino-operating Native American tribes. Always looking for unconventional methods of increasing his personal revenue, Dick recently spent an exhausting hour in the Grand Rapids Public Library researching the warped roots of his family tree before remembering that all records of his bloodline were destroyed years ago - an event which suspiciously coincided with the first of Dick's legendary string of mistrials.
Unable to produce documented proof of his Native American ancestry, Dick has instead attempted to verify his hereditary authenticity by simply appealing to the Saginaw Chippewa Indian Tribe's common sense. Below is a list of personal behavioral habits submitted to the tribe, which Dick feels is overwhelmingly convincing testimony to his obvious Native American descent. Annual checks from the tribe should be mailed in care of the Recoil office.
Shares Native Americans' enthusiasm for firing up the peace pipe.
Can often be found with his head to the ground/floor in a semi-permanent trance, listening to the Earth or whatever those other Indians are listening to.
Used to know half of the bass line to Iron Maiden's "Run To The Hills."
The U.S. government has also made repeated attempts to exterminate Dick.
Once watched Dances With Wolves after eating peyote.
Shares interest in casino gambling.
Usually looks like he slept outdoors.
Also distrusts guys in cowboy hats who carry rifles and sound all fucked up when they talk.
Silently sheds single tear whenever someone litters his habitat with unfinished beers.
Seems to remember a Rage Against The Machine song that had something to do with a Native American - "Freebee" or "Free Gum" or something like that.
Also enjoys getting checks in the mail for doing nothing.
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Eye on Dick
The Recoil Handbook
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