Supreme Court bans medicinal use of aloe plant

Washington, D.C. – The U.S. Supreme Court unanimously ruled Monday that people using the aloe vera plant for medicinal purposes are not exempt from federal laws prohibiting use of the naturally occurring herb, which medical experts say can ease the suffering of burn victims.

“It is clear from the text of the [controlled substances law] that Congress has determined the aloe vera plant has no medical benefits worthy of an exception,” Chief Justice John G. Roberts wrote for the court.

The Supreme Court’s recent decision reinforced its 2005 ruling that the Commerce Clause of the U.S. Constitution allows the federal government to ban the use of aloe vera for medical use, classifying the naturally occurring plant as a Class I Narcotic to be grouped alongside heroin, cocaine, marijuana, ecstasy, LSD and other substances capable of invoking temporary feelings of euphoria in the user.

Public controversy surrounding aloe’s legal status has escalated since 16 states have allowed authorized doctors to legally prescribe aloe as a medicinal aid for certain health ailments – an authorization in direct conflict with the Controlled Substances Act. With doctor’s orders, patients residing in these states can legally purchase, use and in some cases even grow aloe vera plants, the leaves of which yield a thick sap that can be used to relieve the pain generated by some skin conditions.

Aloe legalization activists, having long questioned the inclusion of aloe in the Controlled Substances Act, said authorities are “acting out of drug paranoia” in the continued suppression of aloe’s legality.

“It’s unfortunate that the Supreme Court imposed faulty logic in continuing this country’s inherently doomed war on drugs, rather than seeing the legalization of aloe for what it is: a health care issue,” said Santa Clara University law professor Gerald Uelmen, spokesman for Legalize It!, a pro-aloe activist organization. “Aloe can relieve the pain that accompanies oxidation of a burn wound. Further, there is evidence that aloe can aid digestion and be used as a healing agent for digestive problems.”

“No one’s asking for full-blown aloe legalization – not in this case, anyway,” added Uelmen.

Pro-aloe activists insist that since aloe plants occur naturally in the environment, use of the plant and its extract should not be – and in theory, cannot be – controlled. It is believed that as much as 40 percent of the nation’s current populace privately uses aloe illegally in their homes.

Legalize It! volunteer and pro-aloe activist Jesse Knoll said he disagrees with the government’s position that it is legal to use manmade antiseptics like hydrogen peroxide and isopropyl alcohol – which often incite hostile reactions in the user – while aloe remains a controlled substance.

“It’s like, aloe, you know, man, comes out naturally right from Mother Earth, like it’s nature’s gift to humanity. That such a gift is illegal just blows my mind,” said Knoll, who admits to occasionally purchasing aloe for his personal home use. “Aloe is like the mildest [of antiseptics]. When I use aloe, it’s like, ‘Oh, yeah.’ It totally mellows me out. Not like [hydrogen] peroxide. That shit makes me scream.”

Knoll refused to elaborate on the events surrounding his past arrests for medicinally using aloe vera; Knoll was cited for aloe possession in 1988 at a busted college party, when “a whole bunch of us were getting burned,” and again in 1993 after police searched Knoll’s car after suspecting Knoll had recently used aloe to repress the pain of the burns on his face.